Day 158 & 159

Hello Everybody

Double entry tonight as I was a bit of sorts last night, I have not got the Families Flu yet, but I think its trying, hard to tell when I have had nearly 24 weeks of it's Symptoms... The family is picking up abit but Cheryl still has it bad, so a bit more TLC for her I think, I had a fairly good day today, but I always seem to pickup towards when the next Injection is due. Still taking things easy and been working in my Shed again, keeping occupied seems to keep my Depression at bay and that's a good thing.

Well this week has gone quick and has been a really mixed week for Sx and an old enemy has came back, Thrush in my mouth again, but is clearing thanks to my Lozenges from GP from before and tonight is a lot better to eat with and I have had heaps of itching on my back, where I cant reach..... Grrrrr

Well be good everyone, at least as good as you can.......
John

Day 157

Hi Everyone

Today turned out pretty good and I had my Psychologist appointment and had some good discussions with him, he's not bad after all, guess I was a bit unsure when I first started seeing him, but it seems to be working out Ok. One of my Tx Buddies had his Last Injection and it was a big day, I felt so happy for him and pleased that this part of his Tx is now over, a weeks worth of Ribas left and he will be officially post Tx, a grand achievement indeed for him and everyone else that has gone through Tx....

Was feeling abit head achy tonight and went to bed earlier on feeling not too well, woke up at 2-30 Am and made a cup of tea and did my diary entry, also I think my Thrush is coming back in my mouth, so back on the Lozenges for that. Sneaky stuff all these little Sx, every time you think you got one beat, another one comes along to throw a spanner in the works, but that is ok, I had some Ammo this time around to fix that...Just before I went to sleep earlier tonight, I was getting like little electric shock type feeling's firing off into my arm and leg muscles, wasn't bad,but I thought I would mention it.

Well think I will enjoy my cup of tea now and just drift back into sleep, rest easy my Friends.
John

Day 156

Hi All

Well its happened here, Cheryl and Renee have a shocking flu, don't think it's Swine Flu, as they have been to Doctors and she reckons its another type flu bug, anyway they have had it for two days now, so the Tx patient becomes the carer and the Carers become the patients, omg just got that out, nearly got totally lost in what i was saying then as I was typing, Oh Boy.....

So I have been looking after them and helping out as much as I can, cant go to full steam ahead, but little jobs here and there and meals also. Have to keep one of us on deck and it will be interesting to see if I get it, some how I don't think I will, have been in the car with them, to the Gp's and living in same house, so keeping fingers crossed anyway.

Sx have been very kind today as if maybe the Tx knows i have a job ahead of me that I need to do for my Family.

Stay Focused
John

Day 155

Hi

Went to my Share Care Doctor today for my weekly checkup and handed in my usual side effects study sheets to her, had my OBs done and had her look at the sores again and I have some Celestone Creme to apply on them, to see how they go.Whilst there I have had a growth removed before Tx on the tip of one of my ears that has come back and it hurts to sleep on it but Gp said no cutting out anything till after Tx, which makes sense..

Got some Bloods back
Hb was 109 now 105
WCC was 1.4 now 1.8
Neuts was .55 now .74
Platelets was 66 now 58

Week 24 I have a PCR and FBC & ELFT to be done, so will have some more stats then, other then that wasn't a bad day overall for sides......SSSSSHHHHHH, dont say that too loud Lol

Till Tomorrow and Smooth Journey Everyone
John

Day 154

Hello my Friends

Felt like the Interferon Steam roller and Panza Tank has ran over me tonight and am extremely tired and aching to the bone....

Wont be posting much tonight, as my neck and shoulders feel like i have had stakes in them, must be my mutant side coming out......:

Take Care and see you tomorrow, stay well my friends....

I will leave you with this...... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLuDP0przys

John

Day 153

Howdy All

Had my 23rd Injection tonight and have 1 more left in the box and I will be at the half way mark finally. Today was another reasonable day Sx wise and only had shortness of breath and some tiredness, but otherwise all quiet on the Western Front, What am I saying, I should know better by now and not even mention statements like that.......

Mostly just had some chill out time today and did some small jobs and rested mainly, cant wait to go back to GP soon this thing on my arm is getting bigger and now the one on the other arm is growing, hope I am not mutating into some walking zombie type person with all these weird sores and stuff... LOL

Well that's it folks, needle is kicking in and having a little trouble focusing, that's my excuse anyway......

John

Day 152

Evening Everyone

Well got some of my Blood results today by phone from my Clinic Nurse at the Hospital, they were late getting them, but as she promised I would have them before the day was out, I was waiting anxiously for them, for as I said before the Heptologist was going to reduce my Interferon if my Neuts got much lower.

Fortunately they did go up a little, which gave me a reprieve for a while and I could relax knowing I just take my normal dose on Saturday night, but there is always a But, isn't there, my Platelets have dropped lower again, don't know figures yest till Monday, but she sternly warned me not to go cutting myself or lifting any heavy items and try not to walk or bump into things in relation to bruising. Can live with that, I was more concerned about my Nuets than anything else.

All in all had a good day Sx wise and enjoyed my temporary leave from Sx land, it does help to regroup now and again, just in time for the next onslaught..... LOL

Stay Happy and hope you all have a great weekend
John

Day 151

Hello All


Good day today and felt pretty good today, which makes a nice change, had my Bloods taken today and also went to Gp visit, have put on a kilo since last visit and blood pressures good also. Spoke to her about my anti depressants and the effect the Diazapam has been having on me, so now only take the Diazapam when absolutely necessary, I feel between the Interferon and the Valium, it was having the opposite effect on my depression.

I had her look at my arm and she's not sure if its exma (spelling) or a skin cancer, her feeling is the exma and next week will recheck and re-evaluate and will get some creme for it, i am on some antibiotics at the moment, so see what happens there.Will have to ring Liver Clinic tomorrow to see how my Bloods went today and hopefully they have gone back up, or they said I may have to reduce my meds till my Neuts go back up, they are .55 at the moment and Platelets are low as well.


So hopefully another good day tomorrow and another step forward.....
John

Day 150

Hi

Well today I didn't have a sleep at all during the day and made sure I didn't go into my Cave, till its bed time went into town to the hardware and Cheryl and Renee did somethings they needed to do. It was a pleasant day and it felt good to get out and about, just to do things we wanted to do, rather then had to do, it was a welcome change and my depression is improving and I feel like participating again in life and not just spectating.

My back and leg has also improved, but still treading carefully there, I have a blood test to get done tomorrow and my Share Care GP appointment as well, I am looking forward to the Gp visit to get this evil looking thing that is fast growing on my upper arm looked into......

Last night forgot to take my night time Ribas and Happy pill, which I usually take about 8-00Pm and remembered at Midnight so better late than never, so I took them then, woke up around 3-00am ish and made a cup of tea and just reflected on the past few weeks...

Till next time..
John

Day 149

Hello once again

Today i slept the whole day again and hardly come out of my Cave, Well that's enough of that for now, I have decided to take some of my own medicine and kick myself in the Butt and get out of the Cave and back into the swing of things again.Funny how misery feeds on itself and i was falling victim to this, conjuring up all the excuses why i couldn't face things or get out of bed. Well enough is enough and tomorrow, come rain hail or shine, I am escaping that den of despair and going to do something, don't know what, but what i do know is we often need wake up calls and these can come from the most strangest places or people.

I must confess that I have been feeling sorry for myself and for a lot of others here as well, to do so is not always the best outcome for either myself or them, negativity will and has got people nowhere, including me especially, time now to get the positive side balancing out again and we all will, with help and inner strength...

I hope this finds you all well and rest easy my Friends

John

Day 148

Welcome to the New Week

Not much to report today, still getting over my back and leg pains, ended up in bed nearly all day, don't think that's a good thing for me somehow, might get to used to it...Had some minor rages today and really starting to evaluate my life at the moment, a good friend advised me that this isn't a good time to make life decisions and I think there 100% right..

The way I perceive people and situations at the moment hasn't been exactly the most favourable, also think isolation and loneliness play a big part in our moods and emotions whilst on Tx, These often can become quite a Battle and one that is not easy to defeat at times..What would we all do without the comfort of others here that have gone before us and the ones that are with us now , It would be a cold and lonely Journey, fraught with pitfalls of the unknown....

leave you with this song, it gives me strength often

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7TTKlJ3H4PQ

John

Day 147

Me Again

Had a slightly better day still today with my leg and back pain, I basically just rested and limited any awkward positions that may jeopardise my progress in the pain department, had some visitors today and really had to struggle to be social, guess half was my pain discomfort and the other half was the antisocial Interferon playing again, but got through it.

I also forgot to mention that i have this nasty looking growth still on my upper arm and I asked the specialist about it, as I thought it wasn't right, she examined and thought it may be a haematoma in my muscle, but if so, why does have this horrid wet looking scab thing on it and it has gone from as big as my little fingernail to now as big as my thumbnail in a few weeks and is spreading, I don't trust it one bit. My late Mother whom I nursed till her passing from Melanoma suffered greatly from this aggressive cancer and the relative time it took to spread through her body, call me panicky, call me nervous, but I have seen theses horrid things start from very small beginnings.

So I said to the Specialist i want it out, she said no, your Platelets are way to low for that, what do i do, by nature I am a fairly resilient person, I have had to be, but at times I am no super hero and I am struggling with this particular issue, well I suppose what will be will be and that's that, but I know one thing i will never give up and if there is more dramas to come after Tx, then so be it and will face that then..

Stay Strong People
John

Day 144, 145 & 146

Hi All

Multiple entry tonight for the last few hectic days.....

Thursday
I had my GP appointment in town and had my usual Ob's done and all seemed well, had a chat to her about my back and asked if she could give me some pain relief to help settle it down for the next days long trek to the the Hospital, a 600 klm round trip sitting in a coach, so she said she would give me a Morphine shot as I have had over the years to settle my back down, so the nurse there gave it to me in my upper thigh and for that day and night, my discomfort and extreme pain had dissipated, but the next day I had shooting pains in the leg I had the Injection, that were quite unbearable at times, so by the time I got to the Hospital, I was in shear pain from this injection point.

Friday

Finally arrived after the coach broke down and had to Wait for another coach to take us the rest of the way, when we got to hospital went to pharmacy and picked up my next 2 months worth of Meds and proceeded to the the clinic, the pain now was horrific and when i saw my clinic nurse i had to ask to lie down, I could not sit any longer. She had asked me about the pains and said that the Specialist would be in soon and that she would look at it. She did so and said the nurse may have hit a nerve which may take a while to settle down.
They then went through my latest Bloods and sated that if my neuts go any lower that they may have to reduce my TX, my neuts are .50at the moment and Platelets are 60 ish something, so they are putting me on weekly blood tests for a while, and I have a 24 week PCR coming up also, plus other blood test during the time elft and FBC as well..

Saturday

Well Saturday was a total wash out and I just slept most of the day and tried to get some relief from this leg pain, seems to have helped as it has improved tonight somewhat....
John

Day 142 & 143

Hello There

Tuesday Did not post yesterdays diary entry due to putting my back out early yesterday morning, this was one day where something else overpowered any Sx I was having, my back which I had injured years ago, does go out now and then and is extremely painful. So that was certainly a wake up fast jolt when that happened, could not even sit up in my chair, so hence no post for yesterday.Mainly rested and took some muscle relaxants and panadol, couldn't do anything but....

Wednesday
My back has improved today, but i did take things very gently, as to not set it off again, went to my Psychologist appointment this morning and had a good yack with him and felt good to be able to say some things with people with out them looking at you weirdly, I think he seems OK, but have not been to forthcoming with him yet, not till I have gone a few more visits. The Side effects have been strangely easy on me this week and I am not whinging about that.....

john

Day 141

Evening All

Well today was a much improved day compared to the last 4 Mondays after my Injections, actually slept well last night which was a pleasant gift from the normal needle night's sleeping pattern. Most of the day felt OK, just a little drained but nothing like previous weeks of sickening Sx, did some small jobs just to keep my hands and co-ordination going and of course to keep my brain from wandering to distant places..

Eating is still a problem, feel like food, but cant stand the taste or lack there of, I should say, oh to taste and enjoy food again wont be that far off, just a short stroll till January 2010 really..

Hope everyone is well and keeping positive and most importantly, don't forget to laugh a lot when you can, I find this helps me quite a lot and breaks the monotonous Sx down for a brief while, and any relief at times is well worth it...

Goodnight my Friends, Sleep tight...
John

Day 140

Hi Everyone

Well had my 21st Injection tonight at 8-15pm and starting to feel it's effects slightly now, took some paracetamol with it and just feeling comfortable. Wont speak of how it might go through the night as I may jinx myself as always, so not going there.Had a fairly good day, but a little on edge, nothing real bad, just the anxious type feeling, had some visitors also and I tried to be quite sociable, but often lost my concentration in conversation and had the odd confused look from them, never mind, they must be used to it by now...

Well not much more to report and I think I will go to bed and get some shut eye..........

Good Night All and rest easy
John

Day 139

Howdy

Another day in paradise here folks in the ever changing land of TX, today was another very slow day today also much of the day just slept and chilled out. Had a bit of a rough night last night and basically felt completely stuffed all day, picking up better tonight now and have even been out of the house and went to tea at someones house.... Whoa...scary stuff but good, didn't want to go at first, but when I got there it was all good. I get edgy lately when I am out of my comfort Zone of my home, will have to watch this as it starting to become the norm for me lately, John the Hermit..... LOL

I must mention that still suffering from the brain sides of this Interferon and find it getting harder to combat, but not impossible, will just have to work a little harder on this. Sometimes I don't know what is worse, the body Sx or the brain Sx, bit of six of one and half dozen of the other....

Well on with the show and needle night tomorrow night already, doesn't time fly when your having fun, like being on a holiday camp really, NOT...

Goodnight all

John

Day 138

Hello All

Well another bitterly cold day here again today, took Renee down to the Bus stop to get coach to go to Brisbane for a 3 -4 days to visit her Sister and Brother and it was freezing waiting down there at 7-30 am. Then from there went and got my 20 week Bloods taken in prep for my visit to the the Liver Clinic next Friday, she had some trouble getting a vein as most of them were deeper because of the cold, but she got it and out went some more of the red stuff.

Came home and tried to get started doing some things, but could not get motivated at all and felt really drained today, not from the blood taken, just overall run down, no energy sort of day, so ended up going in the house and just putting my feet up and generally just resting and sleeping on and off during the day, guess my body was telling me to have a easy day and just rebuild my strength.
The groin rash I have is clearing up well now with the new creme I got from the doctors and that's a blessing in it self, because of the itching of it used to drive me mad and it doesn't look very nice scratching down there at all.

Looking forward to Injection 21 this Sunday and heading towards the half way mark, the Interferon does some strange things to our mental condition doesn't it, still having to fight hard not to go back into the Dark area of my thoughts everyday, the Diazapam is helping me cope and to steer clear of these place's thankfully..

Well that's it from me for now, Be Good you Lot.......
John

Day 137

Hi

Had a much better day today, only had dry mouth and some itching skin places, but other then that was quite calm as far as Sx go. Will be getting back into my Health Shakes again to help combat my weight problems and endeavour to try and eat more between meals. The weather here was very windy and cold again, guess that's why they call it winter, LOL...

I was thinking today also about those who are nearing EOT and how life will be for them after it, I hope that everyone whether successful or not, gets there lives back to some sort of normality and peace.Not much more to add tonight, other then to wish everyone well and keep up the fight against these insidious Virus.....

Happy Hunting
John

Day 136

Me Again

Well today was a vast improvement on the last few days, still very washed out and tired, but Sx are becoming manageable again thank goodness, went out to next town today to do some looking around and mostly just to get out of the house for a while and have a change of scenery. Had some lunch and returned in the afternoon, slight headache started and I tried to occupy myself going through some old documents and sorting them, but alas could not get focused at all on this and soon lost patience and went and had a sleep for a couple of hours and even then I couldn't quite settle, probably left overs from the last few days I guess.

The Psychologist rang me up today and informed me that he was putting my appointment off for another week, due to himself having a head cold and he didn't want to expose me to this in my current health state, which I was most happy about him thinking of me in this outcome.

Nothing big planned for Thursday at the moment, just wait and see what it brings to us all.....

John

Day 134 and 135

Hi Everyone

Monday

Well Monday started off sort of OK for the day after my Injection, the usual uneasy feeling, but nothing too bad, I had a GP appointment in the afternoon at 1-40 pm, so down I went to see the 3rd Doctor in the practise, who I have only seen once before a long time ago. My usual Doctor and her Husband who is also a Doctor are still on holidays, hence the 3rd Doctor I was seeing.When I arrived I could feel that I was starting to get tired and was told there was a some waiting involved as she was running behind her appointments, 2 hours later and some sleeping involved, I had a massive headache that almost made me feel as if I wanted to be violently ill everywhere. Lucky I had my daughter Renee with me, as I could hardly even focus on where I was, so my name gets called and in we go, I give her my side effects questionnaires and tell her i am here to get my weight and Blood pressure taken as well as ask about any thing that I might be curious about. She asked why the forms and I explained I was on Tx and this is what the Specialist asked me to submit weekly, Oh she said are you on some sort of Tx, she had my file open on her computer, thought she might have at least looked at it before she called me in. So I get my weight checked and I am back down to 65 kg again, lost most of what I have gained ( Oh Well, back to the Drawing board there ) I then sat back down and she asked me what blood tests she wants me today, I thought what ! , still being very out of it with the Sx and took me a while to realise that she was talking about Blood test Request forms and I was talking about Blood Pressure being taken, Oh she said we can do that and she did, all normal, asked me if there was anything else and I told her about a suspicious growth i have coming up on my arm, she looked and said, Its looks like an old age spot and its OK.
By the time we got out of there, I didn't even know where I was hardly, Lucky Renee has just got her Learners Permit, because I was that ill I couldn't even drive back home and the headache was increasing. I came home and went into the Shower just to stand under the hot water to see if that would help my headache and it did a little bit, I took some Paracetamol and went to bed and couldn't even talk to my Tx Buddies on the phone as we usually do.

Tuesday

I woke up 3-00am Tuesday morning in a lather of sweat and a cloudy head, had to clean up and go outside to cool off, went and slept in another room as to not disturb Cheryl and again awoke at 5.30 am in another lather of sweat and all my bones aching something fierce, so clean up again and laid back down till the sun came up, had my Ribas at 8-00am and went back to sleep for a little while, then another shower and started the day which was very slow I can tell you, picking up now and hopefully was just the last of a bad 4 week cycle of Injection Sx, still feel very warn out and tired, but getting there again.
It nearly broke me the last couple of days, but with my Tx Buddies and my Stubbornness together that's not going to happen !!!!!.
In ending, sorry for long rant, I think that when we agree to take on Tx at the Hospitals, Clinics, we in a way are agreeing to get access to Pandora's Box and each and everyone of us gets a front seat vision and feeling of what this Mythical Box beholds in store for our journey ahead.....

Hope everyone is well and feeling OK

Your Mate
John

Day 133

Hi Again

Well had my 20th Injection tonight at 8-30pm and are starting to feel it's effects now, nothing bad, but can feel something happening hope this weeks needle will be kinder then the past few and give me a bit of a rest from the usual, it may do, because as I have said before, I think patterns seem to form to the Tx after a while, even random patterns, so if it works out like that, hopefully i will have good run this week.

Strange how 3 to 4 days after the Interferon I seem to suffer Sx all over the place, then you come good, as good as one can do on this and then its time to take the next Injection just as your feeling alright, must be to let you know there is no free ride in life eh.Anyway no rages today and did some small jobs around the house, my Brother came over and visited us for a while and gave me a hand doing some shelving. Usually i don't want visitors lately and I don't mean that in a bad way for them, its just me, I seem to find it easier to withdraw from them instead of socialising and enjoying the company, will have to work on this before I alienate all my visitors altogether.....

Keep Well
John

Day 132

Hello There

Slept in this morning till 9-00am, should have been up earlier to take my Ribas at 8-00am, but being a cold and windy morning again today, guess my bed was more appealing, never mind, still took them, just a little late, that's all, as I like to take them at the same time each day if possible.

Dry mouth all day today and have been drinking my usual heaps of water, may be Sx or the windy weather, not sure. Had a a couple of Mini Rages also today at my family, Oh Boy, bet they cant wait till i finish this Tx as they must be sick of my little temper tantrums by now. Thankfully and hopefully they don't take them to heart as i don't really mean to use them as my whipping board.

Had an overall slow day and spent some time with my wife helping her put up pictures in our house, doesn't it make a house feel more homely and personal as you add your feeling into decorating, a nice quiet and peaceful day, which I was very thankful for Sx wise...

Keep well and be kind to each other....
John

Day 131

Hi

Well today was a pretty reasonable day, no major aches or pains, just my usual dizziness, has been very cold and extremely windy here today also. Have noticed the old Taste Buds are starting to go wacko again, thought that part was going well there for a while, ah well, back to soups and Milk Drinks with my health shakes.

For some reason have gone right off potatoes, cooked in certain forms, weird stuff this Tx, never know what little gem it has up its sleeve next.

Still have more reserves to give it.......

John

Day 128 and 129 and 130

Hi Everyone

Haven't posted for a few days, not due to Sx, but had some visitors for a couple of days and the other night fell asleep early, my moods have been a lot better and I feel a lot calmer, still have some funny thinking, but steering that away before it drags me down.

My Psychologist rang me up the other day also and had a chat over the phone and discussed my previous thoughts and feelings and I have an appointment with him next Thursday.. 20th Injection coming up this Sunday and wont belong before I will be half way, yee Haa....

Hair is still thinning out and there are lots of hairs on my pillow case every morning, must keep them to make my wig...The Lip Balm has helped nicely with the corners of my mouth cracking, it soothes and seems to repair it well.

Well that's about all for now, stay Tuned...
John