Day 126 and 127

Hello There

Well the last two days have been a lot better mentally for me as well as my emotions have settled back down also, it's a definitely rocky road this journey we partake in. I have had my 19th injection Sunday night and all went well till the next day woke up really aching in my bones and a massive headache, almost like a migraine, it took most of the day to get rid of it and had a long sleep in the afternoon which also helped. I think the past few weeks have drained me and now its my turn to recuperate and I will.

Went to the GP today and everything OK there, my usual GP, is on holiday and I saw her Husband who also is a Gp there, he helped explain a few things to me about the Interferon and the state of effects it can have on your mind, also mentioned that there are some alternative meds for my depression that may work better for me as well, all in all an informative visit.

Back to my self again now and keeping the cheery face on and trying to keep active and positive as i can, to beat this doom and gloom I have been participating in. Lots of support and well wishes have helped me so much and its great to know i am not alone...

John

Day 125

Back Again

Well last night had my usual broken nights sleep and woke up exactly at 4.00 Am again and from some bizarre nightmare thought the day was going to be another downer, but I have started to come out of this week of pure mental destruction.

I think the thing that snapped me out of it was that my little 3 year old grandson, who is a slow developer and cant talk properly left a message on our answering machine, and his excitement and happiness in his little voice and his broken words made me think how precious life is and that I shouldn't be getting myself down and feelings of self pity, after i played it back a couple of times I sat down and just cried like baby, but it did me good and was exactly what I needed at that very point in time.

Thanx to everyone for you Friendship and Support to me at this one of my lowest points of Mental Sx...

A much happier and back in the positive again person........

John

Day 123 and 124

Hello Everyone

Haven't posted till tonight as I have been right off the planet with severe mind things happening with me, my depression is pushing so hard to get me back into the dark side, I am fighting as hard as i can and keeping occupied as much as i can, but its extremely difficult at the moment.

Don't know sometimes what is worse, the physical Sx or the Mental Sx...
I can tell you that at the moment this is one of the hardest times I have had on Tx with this, I took a Diazapam last night and will take another tonight to see if it helps me take back control of these harrowing feelings of emotions and distress...

Till next time..
John

Day 122

Hi Everyone

Well another not so good day with the old Sx, last night had shocking dreams and nightmares and woke up yelling out, latelyI have been waking up at 4.00 am every morning like clockwork and feeling in such a state, so tonight I decided to take a Diazapam every 2ND night to see if this can get me a whole night's sleep.

Most of the day i did some more light work in my shed and it's taking shape now, It also keeps my mind from venturing into dark thoughts which I have been suffering from lately, cant and wont let these thoughts get the better of me. Had some stomach upset also today and don't know if its a bug or what, but will get it checked out if it doesn't improve soon. Also have starting using some Lip Balm Stick for my cracking corners of my mouth, so will see how that goes as well.

Hopefully I should be be on the up if the patterns hold true with this Tx for me anyway and start to feel a bit brighter.....

All the Best
John

Day 121

Hello

Well today still getting over a rough patch from my Injection on Sunday night, have improved and headache has gone but I am still very sore and drained of energy. Still having some funny mental feelings, but I try to keep active so I don't dwell on them too much.

Will have to start using the Lip Balm stick again as the corners of my mouth are cracking again and I took a Diazapam last night as well, one to help me sleep and two for my anger which is hovering again, but we I will keep that in check.

Concentration seems to have taken a dive again and sometimes forget completely what I was doing or saying, some people might say that normal for old John anyway.....

Lets see what tomorrow will bring for us all... Lots of Happiness and good Health I hope..
John

Day 120

Hi All

Well the GP visit went OK today and it was a cold and miserable rainy day here, I spoke to the GP about my rash in my groin area and now have some new Steroidal creme to see if I can get rid of it and hopefully will do the trick.

Didn't go to Dietitian today as I was feeling very washed from the Needle and aching like no tomorrow and Its a 50 klm round trip and it was pouring rain so i cancelled it.
I am 69 Kg now and have put on 2 Kg since I seen the Dietitian last as well, which is good and my eating is Improving.


Got my HBV PCR results today and I am still detectable, but there has been a viral Load drop and a Viral Log drop as well, the GP was very happy as was I, that at least the Tx is fighting this Two Headed Dragon I have...

So In all a heavy day with Sx and a great day for news....
Life is good..


Lots of Love to all.....
John

Day 119

Hey all

Funny stuff in my head still today, not depression, just like drifty daydream type stuff. Weather here was cool again and some light rain. Had my 18Th Injection tonight and not feeling real well after it, hope its not like usual when this occurs as it does with the erratic patterns that seem to form with Tx, this sometimes indicates the next 2 days are going to be unpleasant, hopefully i will be wrong, but will wait and see and if so, just stack it with the rest of the crap and get on with it.

Going to GP appointment tomorrow for checkup and the Dietitians in the afternoon, at least it gets me out and about and having some social contact outside the family.....

Rest Easy
John